Good Time

Seventy year- old Mary was on an economy class flight to Cape Town. When the aircraft was miles above sea level she noticed a vacant seat at business class. She went to occupy it. The flight attendant saw her and went to persuade her to return to the economy class. She refused with no clear reason. Gary, a grown up who was seated at the economy class came to intervene. "Excuse me young man, let me help you as I know how to deal with old ladies," said Gary. The flight attendant stepped back. After a few minutes after Gary had whispered to Mary, she went back to the economy class. In disbelief, the flight attendant asked Gary, "Old man, what did you tell her?" "I told her that the business class was actually not going to Cape Town," replied Gary with beaming smile.

Naughty Zane stole a cat from his township. He went to a nearby township to sell it. He entered into a house where he found a granny. "I'm selling this cat for R50,' said Zane. "What is the point of having a cat while I don't have rats in my house?" Asked the granny. Ok, I'll organize ten rats for you at R5 each." Replied Zane.

A circus owner popped into a shop to see everyone crowded around a table watching a little show. On the table was an upside down pot and a duck tap dancing on it. The circus owner was extremely impressed that he offered to buy the duck from its owner. After lengthy negotiations they settled for R10 000 for the duck and the pot. A few days later, the circus owner returned to the shop extremely angry. "your duck is a rip-off. I put him on the pot before an entire audience and he didn't dance at all", complained the circus owner. "Hmmm... ", recalled the duck's former owner. "Did you remember to light the candle under the pot? Asked the original owner.

A couple checked into a hotel. The husband wanted to quench his thirst with a few glasses of whisky at a bar, but his wife was extremely tired so she decided to go and sleep at the room. After stripping off her clothes, she climbed on the bed... and just then, an elevated train passed by very close to the window and the room was shaken so hard that she was thrown out of bed down to the floor. She thought that was just an isolated incident, she climbed on the bed again. So violently, another train passed and shook the room again. She found herself on the floor. Trembling with extreme fear, she called the receptionist and asked for the manager. The manager promised to be coming. The manager pitched up and the woman narrated her story. The manager was in disbelief but the woman insisted that the story was not a joke. "Listen, lie here on the bed - you'll be thrown right to the floor!" The manager did just that. He lied next to her. Within a minute, they were down on th...

A drunk man appeared in front of a judge on charges of drunken driving. The judge said, "You have been brought here for drinking while driving". The drunk man replied, "Oh, I was afraid, where is the stuff, let's get started again".

Interviewer: What is the antonym of Good? Linda: Bad. Interviewer: White? Linda: Black? Interviewer: Tall? Linda: Not tall? Interviewer: You are wrong! Linda: You are right. Interviewer: Keep quiet. Linda: Keep talking. Interviewer: Fine, now stop all that! Linda: Fine, now start all that. Interviewer: March out! Linda: Come in. Interviewer: Oh my God! Linda: Oh my devil. Interviewer: You have failed! Linda: I have passed.